Interests:Never cease to be fascinated by the human spirit & imagination. My ultimate goal in life is to break away from my fears and give back to the world what it has given me. Other interests? Nature, diversity, those close to my heart turtles, cultural explorations, philosophy, sleeping to the sound of rain, environmentalism, sustainable development, art, metaphysics, spirituality, music composition, and the study of sound vibrations. Yes, I know, I'm a nutbrain. Occupation:Alternative energy
Every so often, we are reminded of how fragile life is... It is surprising how quickly unexpected events can leave our concept of existence hanging on a thread. Nothing can maintain its original physical form for eternity. But memories and gestures of love and respect can stretch beyond the farthest reaches of the human world.
In light of this note, my thoughts go to a good friend and colleague, Matt Peterson. It unravels me to remember that just a couple of days ago, his warm laughter was floating across the room as we'd all head out for drinks. Matt is the type of person who possesses the ability to make anyone feel welcomed. His compassion, enthusiasm and degree of consideration towards others adds color to a seemingly dark canvas. His diplomatic nature and sense of stewardship have taken him to the far reaches of the world with the Peace Corps and our wind energy company. After being in his presence, it is absolutely impossible to leave without smiling. All along, I have been taking his charisma and sense of humor for granted. But then again, I am blessed to be surrounded by such wonderful individuals inside and outside of work.
The incident began this morning when I entered an ostensibly barren office; greeted by solemn faces and deafening silence. It was an atmosphere that would drain any level of pleasantry. My smile quickly faded when my lead uttered the words, "something awful has happened. Look at the letter on your desk."
For a second, I thought that perhaps we had experienced a detrimental conflict with a client. But as my eyes scanned through the sheet nestled above other documents, I was shocked. My initial assumption of the news was trivial in comparison to the actual incident.
Matt had passed away from an accident on site during our a routine tower installation yesterday. The letter did not specify what this accident involved (presumably to prevent further shock). Nevertheless, it wasn't necessary. The news left little to the imagination. The prospect wasn't pretty. At first, half of my brain froze. I could not think, concentrate or regain any sense of self-control. Then, the waterworks came flooding through. Tear drop after tear drop, I slowly managed to regain my mental composure. All of the tenth floor had left for the day to grieve for Matt's loss. The fifth, seventh, and ninth floor looked bleak. I was on the verge of leaving as well, but decided that what I needed the most was to momentarily distract my mind. Work just happened to suffice as this distraction.
My best condolences go out to those who are still grieving his loss. If Matt was still present with us now, he would be eagerly packing for his China business trip. Do you know what's incredible though? At the age of 25, he had a living will... Matt specifically requested for his body to be incinerated and spread over a national park in Washington State (we both share a love for nature in common). What's more? He also insisted that all of his money be donated to a list of charities indicated on his will!
Ahhh...it's 3:55 A.M in the morning and I can't sleep...
I just arrived home from the "Celebration of Life" event that Matt's family held in memory of their son. I don't think I've ever cried so much in my entire life. Marina and I had previously worked 4 hours or more preparing a scrapbook of all of our memories with him. In turn, this would be a gift to his parents to share with others. It was the least we could do to express our appreciation of such an incredible individual.
For all of the night-sky lovers out there, the Perseids meteor shower will occur next Tuesday (August 12th) and is visible in the northern hemisphere. Don't miss it! The most ideal time to view this stunning phenomena is around 1:30 AM or 2:00 AM. No fancy telescope or binoculars are needed to view this event. Just your naked eye and some supplementary items of comfort (such as a reclining seat, blanket to place on the ground, snacks, etc.) will be more than sufficient. Choosing an area with minimum light pollution also plays a vital part in the visual experience. However, viewing it from your own backyard or apartment complex should be just fine. I might accompany a friend of mine and his group to drive out to a more remote area in eastern Washington to enjoy this event from 2:00 AM -5:00 AM. Going to work the next day might prove troublesome though...
I am slightly bummed that the full/total Solar Eclipse on August 1st was only visible to northern Canada, China, western Mongolia, Greenland and Russia (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BmrFY5quq4). It's moments like these that I appreciate the live-video streaming opportunities that the internet offers. I guess I'll have to wait until 2017 to see the next one... In the meantime, I hope humanity doesn't do something stupid to prevent this---such as a full-out nuclear war. Although my sense of sarcasm or cynicism can be overbearing, I highly doubt something that senseless will happen. My personal faith continues to reside in the fact that each individual has the potential to grow open-mindedly, question our own morals/ethics, make proactive decisions and shine. Viva la Vida!
Cheers to an inspirational being; a supportive friend; a passionate enthusiast; a creative innovator; a curious learner; a brilliant mind; my soul sister. Although my physical presence seems withdrawn from the world right now, I will never forget all of the good times that have passed and have yet to come!
As an elementary student, Valentine's Day use to signify only one thing: "more candy." Remember those good old days when classmates dropped fun V-day cards, chocolate and other sweets down your decorated shoe boxes? We never took a second thought to seriously consider the true intent behind V-day. As a high schooler, V-day meant succumbing to embarassing moments of torture from anonymous valograms (yes, it was quite unnerving to be called up to the front of your class bright and early in the morning while 5 people sing glorious love songs, caress your face, and dance enthusiastically around you). What use to make it worse was that some notes would say "I'm probably laughing at you right now" or "your secret lover"--and they weren't jokes.
Pink and red frilly flowers, heart shaped balloons, lacy lingerie, diamond jewelry, fluffy bears, Happy-go-Sappy movies....*cringe* It's relatively easy to list a plethora of common Valentine's Day gifts or activities people typically purchase or pursue. Every once in awhile, you'll even hear genuinely touching stories from well-acquainted partners (i.e. surprise excursion tickets to the opposite side of the world, sentimental hand-made gifts, a romantic dinner etc.). There's also those ridiculously priced presents that anyone wouldn't mind owning despite how superficial or materialistic it might seem to measure love by monetary value (i.e. 80 gb i-pods with a personalized, engraved love message on the back). For instance, my friend received a new Mercedes (or Honda? I can't remember which) car from her husband... Of course, there is nothing wrong with any of these particular items during Valentine's Day. It's simply fun and presents certainly don't hurt. But c'mon... there's no denying how incredibly commercialized this holiday has become under society's standards.
Quite frankly, I could care less. Needless to say, I believe the initial intent of expressing love behind such a holiday is down-right sweet and cute. It would be exhilarating to be surprised once in awhile. But like my boyfriend said: "Why devote one particular day towards celebrating love when you already know you love someone the OTHER 364 days of the year?" So what did we do or get for Valentine's Day? Absolutely nothing...except what is most important. We let each other know once more how much we appreciate and love the other. I think that's the best gift ever.
This leads to an ageless question I've been asking myself since my childhood: If the singular meaning for love encapulates feelings of tenderness, passion and/or affection towards someone or something, why do I get the impression that there are different types of love? I mean, saying "I love you" to your mother certainly does not feel the same as saying it to your boyfriend, a child, your pet(s), or referring to your passions or selective elemental places. I remember looking up the word when I was 7 and getting even more overwhelmed when loads of definitions would arise. Just refer to this link and you'll see what I mean: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/love
Nonetheless...after much personal observation and deep thought, I believe I've reached a valid and convincing answer. There aren't different types of love at all!Pure love just tends to get intermingled with other feelings (like infatuation, physical bodily desires/lust, selfishness) which makes it more confusing and difficult to separate and decipher. This then brings us to the ultimate question: what is this singular and universal form of love?
From my own interpretation, love is a form of unconditional understanding and appreciation which induces respect, compassion, tenderness, affection and support. And just for more detailed insight, here's what it's not:
Love is not tainted with subtle selfishness. Instead, love is guided by the desire to understand the recipient unconditionally. When you think you love someone, do you love them for who they are or do you partially love them because you see yourself in them? Let's face it, most people who embark out searching for love lean on the practical side of finding someone who shares similarities with them (whether this be personal characteristics, interests, hobbies, etc). But unfortunately, most "love" relationships end because individuals easily mistaken the love they share for their beliefs/interests as an ultimate feeling of love for another person. Don't let your interests and beliefs lock you into a self-created illusion where you establish unrealistic desires in another person. Don't manipulatively masquerade your dreams as a gesture done for the other person in order to gain their approval or love (unless you mean it)! Selfish love inhibits freedom. Because of this, you tend to see some seemingly perfect marriages in the beginning fall disastrously apart in the long run. It's because one person's optimistic illusion of their partner is broken and they come to the self-realization that they can't accept this reality. This mistaken love also manifests itself in family affairs where parents live their life through their child in the false name of love: forcing their child to pursue violin or medical school (because it's what they believe is best...and what they've always wanted to do for themself) rather than allowing their child to pursue what they passionately love (like ballet, art or soccer). It's exciting if an individual shows enthusiasm in your life activities and daily well-being but do you recipricate the same gesture? When it comes to differences in love relationships (between your parents, friends, significant other), you would be keen enough to understand these differences rather then just recognize them on a surface level and wave them by. For instance, let's say your father could care less about sports and loves romantic comedy movies while you're the complete opposite. If your love is true, you would come to respect these differences and actually research romantic comedies out of interest for him---because you want to understand him better. It doesn't mean you have to like what he likes in order to force yourself to be selfless, it just means that you appreciate and understand him for who he is. This brings us to the next point.
Love is not imposing. Like understanding, it is simultaneously the embodiment of respect. Do you accept the person you love for who they are--despite their flaws? No judgement, no scrunity...just pure acceptance. This includes immunity from establishing expectations. If you truly respect someone, you wouldn't expect them to be any other way. You wouldn't even expect them to understand you (even if it would be splendid if they did). You would care only for their happiness without loosing scope on your own happiness. Would you love them even if they didn't follow YOUR standards? If you believe your partner or friend (or whatever) is driven by their dreams more than you, would you respect them enough not to impose your desires on them or show disappointment?
Love is not physical (though it can be expressed through physicality):I hate to break this recognition...but whatever our horny, animalistic instincts to copulate might be, sexual feelings are probably the ultimate false embodiment of love. Regardless, we're human and there's nothing wrong with it... Most people in society probably mistaken this process of "making love" as the real thing because it is an expression of it. Sex is only beautiful when there is true love behind it. Otherwise, well...you end up with casual sex...and that's another ball park in itself.
Love is uninfluenced by social status, appearance, wealth, cultural traditions, reputation and pride. Pretty self-explanatory...and retold over and over again in cliche fables, fairy tales, real-life stories and pop culture.
Love does not entail completing two halves of a whole. I'll have to admit, I apathetically accepted the expression of "soul-mates" without thinking carefully whether it made any sense. Now that I've actually thought about it, society's perception of a soul mate is rather misleading. Our general understanding of a soul-mate as an individual who compliments oneself; however, some people live life with the false precognition of defining soul mates as individuals who understand them perfectly and tend to your every need. But don't get too whisked off by this sappy romanticism. As corny as it sounds (and as sarcastic as I can be sometimes), I truly believe soul mates exist. Nevertheless, I don't like how this preconception leads to overly-fantastical expectations of that "perfect" someone. You're already cutting yourself short when you think this person will "complete you" or are the only shining beacon of light in your life. Don't forget yourself! You are nothing without yourself...and nothing in nature could ever function fully unless it is already whole (spiritually, emotionally, and mentally). Instead, I would rather like to think of love between soul mates as two separate selves amplifying each other's happiness by being themselves.
Of course, there is nothing wrong with any of these particular items during Valentine's Day. It's simply fun and presents certainly don't hurt. But c'mon... there's no denying how incredibly commercialized this holiday has become under society's standards.